Understandably, since we live in a culture of doubt. Generations before us had it harder, at least materially, but in their world, even as it sometimes fell apart, something beneath stayed intact: customs, understanding, a shared floor and foundation. Ours is one where all that underneath has been destroyed. We have everything, except anything that holds humans together. Whatever we try to have faith in is mocked, destroyed, or disappears too fast. And so we doubt. We question everything. We doubt what it means to live, what it means to love, what it means to be a good person, why any of that matters. Nothing is certain. And so, no, we aren’t so much in doubt as to whether we will live tomorrow, but whether there is any point to.
What is it like, to grow up this way? It’s hard to do justice to it. It’s a feeling of constant confusion and indecision. Never knowing the right choice, always unsure of ourselves, checking with others over and over. Immediate distrust of everyone. Suspicious of anything good; hardly surprised by hurt. Heart never fully in things, always holding back. Some of us are stronger in defending ourselves against doubt; others are completely consumed. They doubt everything: who they are, what they want, what they think, what they feel, what they are supposed to feel. Doubt shadows over anything good. Doubt clouds promises or proof. It is draining, exhausting, to exist in disbelief.
We doubt God, for an obvious example. This is the least religious generation in history. Apparently young women have “abandoned” religion, are “fleeing” the pews, and forgetting faith, when really I think many of us never knew it. This is a generation that doesn’t understand how to have faith, never learnt the habit. And adults shrug this off because they think this is simply doubting the existence of God, but no, this is more than that, this is doubting good. This is not just a lack of faith in religion; this is a lack of faith in right and wrong. More and more of us doubtingmorality, seeing no benefit to being a better person, because why, what does it matter?
